This Is Not Trump's America and Other Issues That Need to Be Addressed

Well, this has been a week, hasn't it?  You know it's monumental when you don't have to say anything more clarifying than that and everyone knows what you're talking about.

We all knew this election would be historical and epic, regardless of who won.  What is most epic to me, at least right now, is not the candidates, the gender of one of them or the slew of accusations and innuendo that came out during the campaign.  It's America's response to the results.

People have been losing their minds all over social media; calling for President Elect Trump to be tossed out before he's even packed a thing for the White House, to put Hillary Clinton in his spot, to ban the electoral college and protest, protest, protest.

Let's start with the first item.  Like it or not, the people of the United States have spoken with their ballots and Donald Trump won the election.  He may not have gotten the majority of the popular vote, because of the state of California is huge and with a massive population, but this is why the electoral college is in place.  This is how our system, a republic of the people, works.  You can cry about the unfairness all you like but there is a valid reason it's in place and nobody seemed to have a problem with it until Tuesday night.  You can sign all the petitions you like but it's not going anywhere, nor should it.  

I don't take issue with protests in general, provided they are peaceful protests.  I am scratching my head at what exactly people are protesting.  Are they protesting a fair election?  Are they protesting because they don't like the results?  Sorry, kids.  Where I  grew up, that wasn't protesting, that was being a poor sport.  If you want to protest against something that truly isn't right, turn around and go back to that homeless person - - possibly even a vet! - - that you stepped over to cry your river about how it's unfair that your candidate didn't win.   Protest that how we treat our vets, our elderly and our homeless is shameful.  Volunteer to help feed them and/or just talk to them.  They are people too.

For the college students who are protesting on their campuses, causing scenes, shutting down classes, etc.  Again, you do what you like so long as you're not vandalizing property that does not belong to you or harming others.  But put down your sign long enough to be thankful that you live in a country that allows you not only to voice your opinion freely but provides you with the opportunity for a wonderful education. A lot of people don't have that luxury.

For the college students who are so distraught they cannot go to class and cannot participate in assignments and tests and want to go to their safe space, I would like to meet your parents so I can see for myself what kind of people chose to raise such whiny, incapable individuals.  I have news for you, students.  Life is going to get harder.  For some of you, depending on what choices you make,it might get a lot harder.  If you can't function under the reality that you didn't get your way in this one election, I fear for our future with you far more so than with Donald Trump.

To the parents of elementary school students who are supporting their children protesting this election by walking out of school, shame on you.  Shame. On. You.  You are bad parents.  Your children are not old enough to vote, they should not care about presidential elections and they don't get a say.  They should be outside playing and, you know, being kids.  Stop using them to express your own feelings. You aren't teaching them to be strong and stand up for what they believe in.  You are teaching them to throw themselves a pity party if they don't get their way and that the world revolves around them getting what they want.  Newsflash:  it doesn't.  p.s., you are also teaching them to be assholes.

For those of you who have decided that the best way to protest the results of the election is to vandalize and destroy property which does not belong to you, I am grateful for the everyday existence of cell phone video and hope that once you are arrested, you will appreciate having to clean the state's property while you are in jail or prison.   For those of you living in states such as Oregon, where you lose the right to vote if you are arrested and convicted, what you did makes as much sense as going to Charles Manson for advice on how to treat people with respect and kindness so kudos.

To those persons who have taken to Twitter and Facebook, even with videos, to proclaim your desire and intent to assassinate the President Elect . . . I don't even know where to begin with you.  You really need to understand how our legal system works because what you are doing is a federal felony and you have put it out there not only for the world and your friends to see but also for the Secret Service.  Good job!  If you weren't sure how quickly the Secret Service is on things, you might very well find out.  I hope that while you are away serving your time your friends will up their game and find people who don't use their free time committing felonies.  

To the state of California, my current home, which has rumbled about leaving the nation to become "New California" . . . excellent job in making that dopey brainless California stereotype seem real.  California is broke being part of the States.  Not only that, we get a supply of our water from outside states so how is that going to work?  It makes as much sense as that green light theory of putting a green outdoor porch light on your house if you are a gun free home to symbolize the desire to ban guns.  What could go wrong?    But honestly . . California?  Leave the nation?  Ha ha!  Are we going to put Kim Kardashian in charge of New California?

Now let me get to those of you who are posting videos of alleged Trump supporters who are beating people/vandalizing with racial slurs/threatening deportation of Hispanics and Muslims and labeling them as "Day 1 in Trump's America" or some other such nonsense.  This is not Trump's America.  It doesn't represent America as a whole; it never has.  These terrible, hateful actions have been around longer than you and I.  Sadly, the occurrences happen daily.  They are not being done under Trump's orders, nor Clinton's.  These people are mental midgets who are using this election as a means to justify their assholery.  Don't listen to it.  This is only our future if you feed into it.  We are better than this.   Instead of uniting in hatred against people who voted differently than you, or didn't vote at all, unite to put an end to these people who perpetuate hate crimes and then have the audacity to claim they are doing it under the guise of for the good of the people.

Last, but certainly not least, we should be calling out the media for their ugly, repugnant part in this election.  They created a mob mentality and are continuing to foster it by telling us how devastating a Trump presidency will be, cherry picking those particular events that highlight hate crimes and suggesting the possibility that Trump's presidency will be thrown out.  I see you, media.  You have shamed the field of journalism to the point of no return.  You have passed off gossip, rumors and innuendo as news.  I'm not immune; I fell for it too.  You should be called out so I'm doing that.  Remember, folks, this is same media who told us all that Trump had zero chance of winning the election so they don't know shit.

I'm going to sum this up by saying this.

Ignore the media.  They suck.  They are doing the same thing they have done for months; feeding their own agenda; scrambling for ratings; proving what piss poor analysts they are and jacked up human beings.  Stop it.

Accept.  You can be sad.  You can be disappointed.  But it is what it is.  The sun came up this morning, as President Obama said.  Life goes on.  Make it a good one.

Pray for Trump's Success.  Wanting him to fail, hoping that he will fail means that we all will fail.  Why would you want that? Whether you voted to elect him into office or not, he will be our great nation's new president so wish him well  and give him a chance.

Love Each Other.  Last week everyone was preaching love and tolerance.  Bring that back.  Love your family, friends and neighbors.  Unite this country.  You can do it.  We can do it.

Don't Be An Asshole.  Enough said.

Hate, Intolerance, Fear and Orlando

I wasn't sure if I wanted to write this post.  It's kind of like writing about politics - - you're going to piss half the population off and get emotions running sky high.  But it's weighing on my mind and I haven't written on this site recently (bad me).  I do have a good excuse for not writing though - - I am working on projects.

The attack in Orlando reminded me somewhat of Columbine only in the sense that our society seems to be moving to opposite ends of the spectrum since 1999.  There was outrage, shock, horror and unbelieving when Columbine happened.  Bear in mind that Columbine was not the first school shooting but the sheer violence of it and the number of dead and wounded struck a chord in Americans.  Seeing kids - - kids - - running from their school in fright and even dangling out of windows in a desperate attempt to escape were horribly powerful images.  As much as there were days when I didn't want to go to school in my youth, school was still a place of safety.  Never did I worry that I would be physically harmed, much less taken down with a gun by a classmate.

It's now 2016 and I'm no longer a teenager (although if I could go back then knowing what I know now . . . )  Hearing about the senseless attack at the nightclub in Orlando it seems that there is almost a sense of resignation in this world.  There is sadness, yes, and there is shock and anger.  As well there should be.  But isn't there also a feeling of "again?" or just a weary sigh that it's happened somewhere else?

I know many people feel the problem is guns.  I agree that we need to have stricter gun control laws.  But someone like the Orlando killer, who I will not dignify by naming, that is so intent on harming a group of people for whatever reason is going to do so by whatever method possible.  Yes, a gun makes it easier and usually ups the victim count.  I get that.

So what is the answer?

Hate and intolerance have been around since Cain killed Abel.  It's sad and discouraging.  Can we end it by posting memes and asking people to stop?  Maybe, maybe not.  

Rather than focusing on the hatred and the intolerance - - which I think is nothing more than old fashioned fear - - I find some level of hope in how people react.  Showing compassion, reaching out to victims, donating blood,  celebrating the victims and the heroes and standing united.  It reminds me of the ice storm that hit my hometown of Atlanta and neighboring Alabama a year or so ago.  The national media did little more than laugh at the stupid southerners who freaked out over a little ice and how a big city like Atlanta shut itself down from this little bit of inclement weather.  The people actually in it though?  Many of them banded together to take coffee, hot chocolate, water, sandwiches and fruit on foot to persons trapped in their vehicles.  They offered shelter to strangers, cold in their cars.  They took their own vehicles, with chains, to help pull others out.  In other words, they came together as a community to support each other.

That's what I hope we will get out of this terrible tragedy.  In the end, we're all just people.

Rant over.  Back to my normal sarcasm.

It's November, Are You Feeling Thankful?

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20/20: Simpson Deposition Tapes

Timing can be an ironic bitch, can't it?  I can think of a handful of times that things didn't work out for me (sometimes in my favor, sometimes not) because of some very minor timing.  It makes me wonder "what if" and what my path might have been had that timing been different.

I know, you're probably wondering what the hell this has to do with O.J. Simpson and the so-called trial of the century.  I'm getting there but, as always, I like to talk.

It's been twenty years since the verdict was rendered in the criminal trial.  Like 9/11, like Princess Diana's fatal accident and JFK Jr.'s plane going down, I know exactly where I was when the reading of the verdict happened.  Like the infamous white Bronco chase, which I also remember in vivid detail, I recall with exact clarity my feelings at the time and my emotions in general because I was in an unhappy relationship and time has allowed me to equate the Simpson case with that relationship.

Being one of the lucky that deals with Southern California traffic on the daily (and I say that with heavy sarcasm), I listen to audiobooks as a way to cope and not commit a felony.  In a bizarre touch of irony, I downloaded How I Helped O.J. Get Away With Murder last week.  No idea the twenty year anniversary was rearing its ugly head or that 20/20 was airing previously unseen deposition tapes of Simpson on Friday night.  Nope, just a weird coinky-dink.



Ron Goldman on 6/12/94, the last day of his life

Watching 20/20 brought back a minefield of frustration, anger and disappointment.  Back in June of 1994, I knew of O.J. Simpson but mainly as an actor of sorts.  I knew very little of football then so had no idea of his iconic status in the sports world.  No, I felt no connection to O.J. Simpson or his history; I felt connected to Ron Goldman. 

I had never met Ron, never would, but we were the same age.  In fact, Ron was born twenty-four days before I was.  Hearing of a vibrant young man, the same age I was, being murdered - - a victim of unfortunate chance, guilty only of being in the wrong place at the wrong time - - filled me with a horrible sympathy. 

Throughout the last twenty-one years at various times I have thought of Ron Goldman.  I have had many life events, moments, that he has not had - - happy, sad, traumatic, joyous.  He will never have them.

Watching his killer's nonchalant and dismissive attitude on the deposition tapes aired on 20/20 brought all those feelings back to the surface.  This appeared to be a game to him, nothing more and nothing less. 

While I believed he was guilty of those horrible murders from the beginning, I do wonder if those people who believed in his innocence can still hold on to that after viewing the tapes.  Never mind the physical evidence, which led to no one else but Simpson.  Never mind the evidence of Simpson's abuse.  Never mind Simpson's eventual incarceration in Las Vegas.  If Simpson were truly innocent, wouldn't he have commended Ron Goldman?  This young man attempted to save the mother of Simpson's children.  He should have been a hero in Simpson's eyes and yet he, and his family, are met with nothing but contempt by the killer. 

Ron was a hero, he still is.  He may be the only person who ever stood up to Simpson, stood up for Nicole, and he died for it.   He won't be forgotten; he will be remembered for being an honorable, heroic young man.  I hope at least this small bit of knowledge gives the Goldman family some measure of comfort, knowing Ron has not been forgotten.

What do you think?  Did you watch 20/20?  Are you surprised by the tapes?  Disappointed?  Justified?

Advance Screening: "The Intern"

I love Nancy Meyers.  I've been a fan since Baby Boom and can watch that movie (along with the Father of the Bride remakes with Steve Martin, The Holiday, It's Complicated, et al.) on repeat.  She's witty and she just gets relationships so well which translates in her movies.  The gold medal casting is a bonus.

When I was offered the chance to screen The Intern in advance of its opening date this week, I quickly jumped at it.  And I am certainly not sorry I did.

The Intern is a different type of relationship movie.  It's not a rom-com although it centers around the professional relationship between Robert DeNiro's Ben and Anne Hathaway's Jules.  Ben, a widower who has been retired for two years spends his days at Starbucks and attending funerals but still feels that he has something to offer and can be useful.  Jules is a young wife and mother and the brainchild behind About the Fit, a booming e-commerce business she forsaking sleep and food to run.  From the start, Meyers threw us a curve ball by having the 30-ish Hathaway be the 70 year old DeNiro's boss.  There are gestures to Ben's old school ways of working (suit and tie, an attaché case) and to Jules' new age way of working (riding a bike around the office, very long hours.)  Some differences are remarkably subtle, others played very much for a laugh.

Anne Hathaway does a wonderful job playing a character that could be brash and ultimately unrelatable but while Jules is driven and focused, she is also allowed to have a soft, emotional side that is revealed at exactly the right time.  Rather than becoming a Miranda Priestley knockoff, Jules is more of a Devil Wears Prada Andy, after a few years in the trenches.  We understand Jules, feel for her when the judgy moms at the playground are being, well, judgy, over her career and, even better, want Jules to succeed. 

As well cast as Hathaway is, Robert DeNiro is even better.  He is the heart and soul of The Intern, with a performance so achingly sublime it's miles away from the intensity of Taxi Driver and the in-your-face comedy of Meet the Parents.  He makes the movie for me and any time he was off the screen (fortunately not often) was wasted in my opinion.  I'm glad that Meyers didn't go cliché or stereotypical with his Ben - - no romance with Jules, no health crisis, no mourning over his situation.  Ben keeps it moving and that's refreshing. 

The chemistry with DeNiro and Hathaway was true but I also enjoyed seeing his interactions with the younger (i.e., twenties) interns he was working with.  Their confusion over his attire, his customs was humorous and it was gratifying to see that while they picked up some tips from him, he also learned from them.

Nancy Meyers not only wrote the script but was at the helm of this movie.  To repeat, she is a nuanced writer who understands relationships, whether they be romantic, platonic or familial.  You name it and she nails it.  She did a splendid job here, writing and directing, showing the relationship between Ben and Jules developing organically, with the seeds of a real companionship taking root. 

If you're familiar with previous Meyers movies, yes, there is a nice bit of house porn and even office porn.  I always notice this - - love Jules' brownstone, which reminds me of Meg Ryan's in You've Got Mail.   Even About the Fit's office is a sharp space, a modernized former factory that reminds me more than just a little of Steve Martin's Sidekicks factory/office from Father of the Bride.  And the flowers we see scattered here and there are gorgeous.

Will everyone like The Intern?  No, probably not.  It's about a relationship but not as talky as When Harry Met Sally.  It's humorous but there are also some deep, emotional scars that need to be tended.  Nothing explodes or blows up and there is no nudity. Part of Jules' struggle may be difficult for some or offensive to others.  If you're not a fan of Hathaway or DeNiro, you may want to take a pass.

I enjoyed it and felt that it was pleasing to the majority of the audience in attendance.  Sure, I heard a man behind me say that he was glad he didn't pay but overall, the movie was sprinkled with laughter from the viewers and a satisfied round of applause upon the conclusion.  While I couldn't help but wonder if Meyers' muse Diane Keaton would have been cast if Ben had been written to be a female, I left The Intern feeling content, satiated and yes . . . wanting to move into that brownstone.

The Intern opens nationally Thursday evening.     

Let's Talk Sports Movies

Mark Wahlberg as Vince Papale in Invincible

I was raised on baseball, bred to be a diehard Atlanta Braves fan no matter what.  I supported my team back when Joe Torre was manager and the Braves couldn't win a game to save themselves.  That was back when they finished in the basement and the few people that showed up at the old Atlanta Fulton County Stadium wore paper bags on their heads because being a Braves fan wasn't something to be proud of. 

Later on I would add Nascar and hockey to the sports I enjoyed watching, and thanks to an ex, football and basketball.  I guess it's true that he did do something good for me.   Okay, I jest.  I did get a Kindle, auto start for my car and my dog from him.  But I digress.

I love sports movies.  I'll watch any and all of them.  I don't care what sport so long as it's a underdog type tale and then I'm in.  I can't remember the first sports movie I fell victim to - - maybe it was The Bad News Bears (the original with the great Walter Matthau) or maybe it was being an extra in The Slugger's Wife (which is quasi-sports.)  Point is that sports movies are a mean master to me.

Invincible was on cable last night.  I own it on DVD and yet I still stopped what I was doing to sit and watch.  And cry.  I cry when Mark Wahlberg, as Vince Papale, is told he ran a 4.5 from Greg Kinnear as Coach Dick Vermiel.  I cry when Kinnear tells Wahlberg "Welcome to the Eagles."  I cry when Vince tells his best friend Tommy, the underrated Kirk Acevedo, he's a Philadelphia Eagle.  I cry when Vince rips up the note his ex wrote him, telling him he was nothing and would never amount to anything.  I cry when Vince picks up a fumble and scores a touchdown against New York.  I cry at the end when we see clips of the real 1976 season and the real Vince Papale.  Yep, I love this football movie.  I love Mark Wahlberg in the role and I love the feel-good nature of it.  And let's be honest, the soundtrack kicks some ass.

And it's not just Invincible.  Major League, Remember the Titans, Draft Day, The Replacements, The Pride of the Yankees, Rocky, Field of Dreams, Bull Durham, 61*, Miracle, Rudy, Eight Men Out, We Are Marshall . . . the list could go on and on.  They all require me to have tissues handy while watching, even those that are comedies.  Is it a hormonal imbalance?  Weak tear ducts?  Improper diet?  No idea but these flicks make me an emotional mess.  And I love them.

I dare you to watch The Pride of the Yankees, with the amazing Gary Cooper portraying Lou Gehrig, and not cry.  It's simply not possible.  Or how about the closing scene of Field of Dreams where Kevin Costner has a catch with his dad?  (Although I start bawling when Archie "Moonlight" Graham steps off the field to become Burt Lancaster's Doc Graham and then walks off into the cornfield amid a variety of "good games" from his fellow players. It's a heart tugging moment and it's Burt Lancaster so there you go.) 

So talk to me, friends.  What do you think about sports movies?  To cry or not to cry?  Which is your favorite?

Chill Out, September

My parents visited for Labor Day weekend and that was fun.  It's always good to show your parental units that you are doing okay, you're not eating Top Ramen and sleeping on a futon over the age of thirty-five and you do have some good friends.  The weather was decent and (surprisingly) the SoCal traffic wasn't cringe-inducing.  Did everyone leave Cali for the holiday? 

So with Labor Day over, that means summer is over (although not officially until the end of this month.)  Normally I love summer but I am ready for it to end this year.  August was not the kindest month (boo, August!) and the heat . . .

I know, I know.  We Californians complain about the weather incessantly. It's either too hot, too cold, it's not raining, it's raining.  Yeah, yeah, yeah.  I really think weather complaints are a Californian hobby.  But ninety degree temps at the beach suck.  Unacceptable.  Especially when you don't have a/c - - because you shouldn't need it at the beach! 


I am ready for autumn.  I am ready for chilly nights.  I am ready for fall clothes (although we really don't have much use for them until winter here.)  This time of year reminds me of two things - - the huge fall/back to school issue of Seventeen magazine from my adolescence and the line in You've Got Mail about wanting to buy school supplies ("Don't you just love New York in the fall?").   As much as I love Southern California, I do miss the obvious change of seasons you see on the east coast.   Who else considered the fall issue of Seventeen magazine their bible? 

Speaking of - - well, relatively - - watching movies like You've Got Mail, When Harry Met Sally, Serendipity . . . and even shows like Sex and the City make me crush on New York.   Who wouldn't want a gorgeous brownstone like Meg Ryan's Kathleen Kelly in You've Got Mail?  (Not to mention that beautiful little bookstore.)  Or Carrie Bradshaw's completely unrealistic rent controlled writer's paradise with a closet full of Manolos?  Sign me up. 

Back to Labor Day.  Quiet low-key day for me, since my parents flew back home.  Not that I minded since I was pretty beat.  I flipped channels and ended up watching a Kardashian marathon.  Don't judge.  What I took away from the episodes I saw?  I liked the Jenner house from the early seasons much better than the larger one they upgraded to later on.  The first house looked homey and comfy.  I also thought Kim K. looked so much better pre-Kanye.  Sorry but there it is.  She looked more natural and I thought her clothing choices were better.  Sorry, Kimye. 

Hard to believe the show has been on for what?  Seven or eight years?  They certainly did a stellar job creating an empire out of a family that really didn't do all that much initially when you think about it.  Kris Jenner is most definitely a shrewd business manager.

Anyone else get stabby over traffic today?  First day of school gives us Californians a legitimate gripe.

Happy Hump Day!